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PostPosted: Tue Oct 08, 2002 5:33 pm 
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Look the someone called k@ try and give me the money for the vote. Like some dirty gweilo police from 1960s. But you cannot buy me. I am Forttune!

Whay Ah Fortune,

I am currently following rules of Ancient Chines Custom by attempting to bribe people for votes. I hope you will accept this humble gift of one Avatar for use on the Lamma Forums.

I hope you will enjoy your Avatar and vote for me the K@ by clicking the link below.

http://www.lamma.com.hk/forum/viewtopic.php?t=249



As you will surely know the Chinese characters mean Good Luck so match nicely with your adopted English name. The gent in the pic is also called Mr Chan. No surprises there then.

Best wishes to your venerable self

The K@

PS Sorry I couldn't find a sewer pipe.


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 Post subject: k@!
PostPosted: Tue Oct 08, 2002 6:45 pm 
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Mr. k@,

What do you have to say for yourself after these severe allegations and testimony of Mr. Fortune Chan above?

You are the current front-runner in our Coolest Online Identity competition, you should be a shining beacon of righteous morality!

You must be aware that we're running a clean and fair competition here on Lamma.com.hk, supervised by our legal adviser, Mr. LammaNetPolice!
I'm sure he'll step in personally soon and explain the potentially severe consequences of these alleged irregularities in the voting process!

Mr. k@, please explain yourself ASAP!!!


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Oct 08, 2002 7:38 pm 
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Lord of Micturition, Keeper of the spoon
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Joined: Thu Aug 15, 2002 4:22 pm
Posts: 484
Location: Las Cruces, New mexico, USA
It is ok. I have made an avatar for Lammanetpolice too just to play safe and keep eveything above board. Of course there is no possibility of bribing Lammanetpolice, it is just my way of supporting our local upstanding officer.

In fact I have sent avatars to lots of people. It is up to them if they vote though. I just thought it was a nice way of saying hello to forum members I haven't met

Mr Chan can accept my Avatar as a bribe if it suits his world view and vote for me, or accept my avatar as a gift and not vote for me. It is up to him.

Lammanetpolice is after him already for impersonating a police officer (or is it the other way round?) so I wouldn't put much store in the acusations of such an obviously shady character.

If the matter comes to arbitration I would like to call our illustrious leader WebDog as a character witness for Mr. Chan.

If anyone else would like to accuse me of bribary because I sent them an avatar they can reply below. If they received an avatar from me free of charge or obligation I hope they will also post a reply in my defence below.

Also if you feel like voting in the ID competition poll I would be grateful, but in view of the above acusation I must point out that you are under no obligation to even if I sent you or offered to make you an avatar.

FC. FYI: Although Curruption in HK was rife in the sixties, the major police bribary scandles were exposed in early 70's. Ian Hunt, Peter Godber and later, Norman Temple were the most publicised officers involved, although Peter "tiger" Godber was, in my opinion, used as a scapegoat. Godber got 5 years. Hunt got 1 year as he also, it is rumoured, had a file on active homosexuals in the HK police (which it is rumoured, included the Commissioner at the time) and threatened to publish it if he was not allowed to turn Queens evidence in return for a reduced sentence. Norman Temple, head of Triad investigation, was not prosecuted till later, around 1973-74. It is interesting to to note that the death of another officer much more recently and in suspicious circumstances spawned the infamous McMillan Enquiry which lasted several years. Police claimed that when McMillen was fired for being caught in a homosexual act he committed suicide by shooting himself 5 times in the chest from close range with his service revolver. Fellow officers and friends, it is rumoured, believed MacMillan had threatened to expose other Gay officers of much higher rank unless he was reinstated. The MCMillan enquirey returned an open verdict. It is also interesting to note that when ICAC began bringing Desk Seargents and Rank and File coppers to justice, the entire rank and file went on strike until they were granted amnesty on mass. This was granted and ICAC began focusing more closely on the Jocky Club, Government and Business corruption.


Last edited by k@ on Wed Oct 09, 2002 2:34 am, edited 5 times in total.

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 Post subject: OK!
PostPosted: Tue Oct 08, 2002 7:45 pm 
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Well, OK, thanks for your clarifications, Mr. k@,

Let's hear now from other witnesses in this impending bribery scandal, before the tabloids get a hold of it...


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Oct 08, 2002 8:33 pm 
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Hi, I got my avatar off Mr K@ and he did not even ask me to vote for him. So I don't think it is fair of mr Chan to acuse him of bribery. If what mr chan has put is a message from the K@ I am sure he was just making fun of horrible mr Chan because he is a racist biggot! Also I bet he poos his pants and walks round all day with it and that is why he lives next to the sewer pipe.

However I am willing to offer a bribe to everyone except smelly pants Fortune Chan if they will vote for me!

If you vote for me let me know and I will e-mail you a picture of my boobies.

Roll up! Roll up!

_________________
howdy stranger


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Oct 08, 2002 8:54 pm 
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Location: Altrincham
Hi, I am Joannes friend and I will vote for either Joanne or mrK@ if either of them maketh me an avatar of Bede.

I do not want a picture of Joannes boobies as I am a hetrosexual girl and I have already seeneth them. They are quite funny looking. hahahaha!

Also I think Mr Chan is a big fat, lying, bogie picking, urine soaked pile of hyena's doos!

So there!

_________________
"Never stick your fingers in a light socket", said the venerable Bede
ecclesiastica historia


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Oct 08, 2002 11:00 pm 
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Lord of Micturition, Keeper of the spoon
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Joined: Thu Aug 15, 2002 4:22 pm
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Location: Las Cruces, New mexico, USA
TVB. Is that you Pattycake?

I saw Joannes boobies too when she was about 3 or 4 years old. They were pretty funny looking then too. :D

Also here is a Bede avatar you can use. However please don't vote for me, vote for Joanne and then send me the booby picture which I can swap back to her in exchange for a pint of beer. Or maybe her dad would like to buy me the beer. hmmm....

{L_IMAGE}

No doubt Mr Chan will now report me to LammaNetPolice for blackmail. :confused:


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Oct 09, 2002 2:00 am 
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Sorceress of Earthen Majicks
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Joined: Thu Aug 15, 2002 5:09 am
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Location: Bend, Oregon, USA
All I can say is that Cheshire K@ makes avatars for everyone. This isn't the first forum that I've seen him offering his avatars on. He makes them for all the forums he's on.

Think of it like a handshake. If a prospective politician shakes your hand, gives you a button to wear and says "Please vote for me.", that is not a bribe. Its simply a marketing scheme, designed to keep his name in the front of your mind.

Its the same thing. Nothing wrong with that.

Besides, k@ has enough friends, he doesn't need to resort to bribery to win any popularity contests... :)

_________________
[img:2fb7e191f0]http://www.web4uk.tv/2.gif[/img:2fb7e191f0]


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Oct 09, 2002 9:36 am 
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I cannot believe that Fortune Chan would have the unmitigated audacity to accuse my worthy and esteeemed friend k@ of bribery!

Oh! The humanity!

What about the children?

Can't we all just get along?


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 Post subject: More witnesses, please!
PostPosted: Wed Oct 09, 2002 9:49 am 
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OK, so far, so good...

Would any more character witnesses like to step forward in this public hearing, please!
We'd like to hear testimony on Mr. k@'s honorable character and decent behaviour, or a lack thereof???


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Oct 09, 2002 12:45 pm 
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K@

FYI:

Real name MacLennan not McMillan

Real name Ernest "Taffy Hunt not Ian Hunt

Taffy Hunt wasn't 'rumoured' to have a file on active homosexuals, he led the squad who investigated gays (gay still illegal then).

But hey gweilo, who care about facts...

Anymore lesson in Hong Kong history?


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 Post subject: Order!
PostPosted: Wed Oct 09, 2002 2:41 pm 
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Mr. Chan!

I have to call you to order in the public hearing in this forum!
You're interrupting the hearing of witnesses on Mr. k@'s character with your strange and very confusing comments above! What are you talking about???

You started this hearing with your serious allegations against Mr. k@, accusing him of blatant bribery, as the front-runner in our Coolest online Identity competition!

Mr. Chan, would you please desist from interrupting these investigative proceedings in such a strange and disruptive manner, confusing everybody who's attending this hearing! Your turn to speak will come soon!

Thank you for your consideration!


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Oct 09, 2002 2:59 pm 
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Flora & Fauna Moderator
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Joined: Mon Aug 12, 2002 9:19 pm
Posts: 1046
Location: Tai Peng
**********
But you cannot buy me. I am Forttune!

Whay Ah Fortune,
**********

Whay aye Fortune? It must be Chinese Geordie, like.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Oct 09, 2002 3:17 pm 
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Lord of Micturition, Keeper of the spoon
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Joined: Thu Aug 15, 2002 4:22 pm
Posts: 484
Location: Las Cruces, New mexico, USA
FC. I don't like getting sued. :mrgreen: So I generally say "rumoured" or "in my opinion". "A reliable source" doesn't quite cut it in court. MacLennan, yes those Scottish names all look the same to me after a few pints.

Eanest "Taffy" yes sorry, Ian was his son's name (or was it Chris) and he got much more pocket money than eveybody else and had TWO Crombies from Burtons. Once he tried to tip the waiter at the Football Club, which I thought was laying it on a bit thick.

As you now know, I'm not much good with names and was writing my potted history from memory quite late and quite full of beer. Sometimes I get mixed up, say, between John Fox and Clive Brooke-Fox much to the latters annoyence. (and who could blame him). I couldn't remember the name of HK's boss Policeman at the time either so ommitted it, but I now remember it was Roy Henry or Henly or Hendry. Maybe you know which.

Many thanks for putting the record straight.

I do have more HK history lessons I'm sure, but non spring to mind at the moment. However, you seem to be very well informed for a sewer pipe dweller. Are you an ex-British Military Intellegence Officer or did you once play cricket with John Fox and Mike Duggan, or were you, perhaps, in Taffy's file?

Maybe you can post some of your own history lessons as you seem to be far better at remembering the fine detail. :D I got most of my info off 'Chung Chau Reactor Rabbit' who has a memory like an elephant. HE will probably remember Peter Godber's dog's name if he had one, and the number if his house in UK.

PS. No hard feelings about the Bribery allegations. I guess you were just having a laugh. I do not think "you poo in your pants and walk round with it all day", unless, of course you are really Andy Windebank or John Fox, in which case it's a possiblity. Please feel free to use the avatar if you like and vote for anyone you like or no one at all.

{L_IMAGE}


Why not vote for your good friend WebDog as he has a nice avatar?


Last edited by k@ on Wed Oct 09, 2002 4:55 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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 Post subject: !!!
PostPosted: Wed Oct 09, 2002 4:44 pm 
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Classy Rock Goddess & Miss Lamma.com.hk!
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Joined: Tue Jul 30, 2002 10:26 am
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If he's found guilty, will he be disqualified from the competition? :twisted:


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 Post subject: Maybe...
PostPosted: Wed Oct 09, 2002 5:03 pm 
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bbchris,

You'd like k@ to get disqualified, would you?
As the first runner-up, but quite far behind in the voting right now, you should try MUCH HARDER to get more votes instead of publicly hoping for k@'s disqualification!

The LAW will prevail, peace and order will be restored after the deadline of the voting, Oct 15, the winner announced and a free home page designed and hosted for him/her by yours truly!

But there are also FOUR runner-up prizes!

Mr. k@, not living on Lamma anymore, has already donated his prize, whatever it may be, to a worthy recipient, "Nick the Bookman"!

A "Nick the Bookman" website would be fun, don't you agree, promoting his moving business, designed by "Lamma-Gung the Webmaster"!


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Oct 09, 2002 5:07 pm 
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Location: Las Cruces, New mexico, USA
Chris: ha ha. I hope Fortune Chan is not really Shaun trying to get me booted so you can win!

PS Gung: could I transfer my votes if I got booted? Or would you give anyone who had voted for me a chance to recast their vote. In which case I could endorse another candidate.

PPS. Chris: Hope you have a lovely birthday and have lots of cake and get lots of presents. :jump: I see from your SOS mail out you now have your own SOS radio channel. I will go visit soon and see what is playing.

Here is the link if anyone else wants to.

http://www.javamusic.com/Station/SOSAppreciation


Last edited by k@ on Thu Oct 10, 2002 3:01 pm, edited 2 times in total.

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Oct 09, 2002 6:09 pm 
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I will vote for the great and much honour Circle K. He now my friend. As for slag who say I carry poo poo all day in my underpant... you must be careful...


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 Post subject: Avatar law?
PostPosted: Wed Oct 09, 2002 6:12 pm 
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k@ {L_WROTE}:
PS Gung: could I transfer my votes if I got booted? Or would you give anyone who had voted for me a chance to recast their vote. In which case I could endorse another candidate.

Don't worry, as you've so altruistically offered to donate your prize to the ever-popular Nick... there'd have to be VERY SERIOUS AND PROVEN allegations against you to disqualify you!

The character witnesses have spoken highly in your favour.
But no positive character witnesses for Mr. Fortune Chan have stepped forward so far, not a single one!

No clear evidence of your vote buying yet, just currying favours with your Avatars, which is not illegal in HK, as far as I understand local law.
But I can check with some of the lawyer friends of my wife..

Or Mr. LammaNetPolice can advice us in these legal matters?
He got an initially quite hostile reception here on Lamma.com.hk, so he seems to have gone into hiding! Where's the police when we need them???

Anybody here knows HK laws on Avatars?


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 Post subject: CONCLUSION!
PostPosted: Wed Oct 09, 2002 6:26 pm 
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"Circle K"? That's you, Mr. k@, isn't it?

Wow, Mr. Fortune Chan is even using your very nice Avatar now!

So all is forgiven & forgotten, (virtual) handshakes exchanged and new friends made?

That's great! That's what we love to see on Lamma.com.hk!
As "shonky" said in this forum recently "Ah, the humanity! What about the children? Can't we all just get along?".
(That's a quote from Jack Nicholson in "The Witches of Eastwick", isn't it?) :lol:

OK, I declare this public hearing successfully concluded, no laws have been broken, all parties are reconciled...

let's relocate this hearing to the pub, as it's sunset now here on Lamma, PUB TIME!
k@ is sponsoring a round for EVERYBODY!
:lol:


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